Entertainment

Just in Time for Halloween: The Complete Guide to Scary Movies

Halloween has been one of my favorite holidays for as long as I can remember. When I was younger I liked it because you got free candy from strangers and didn’t end up on the news after it. Once I got to college I liked Halloween for a different reason, which still holds true today, in that almost every girl dresses up like any possible fantasy a man has ever had. Almost every girls costume consists of Sexy then insert noun basically. It’s a beautiful thing. One thing that has rained true through all the years is that feeling of getting scared, especially from movies.

I love horror movies. There is something cool about that true and honest feeling you get from being scared. It is way easier to watch a movie to get scared than going to a haunted hayride, house or amusement park. I prefer to keeps my scares localized, I don’t need to leave my couch for it. So horror movies are the best way then.

I am a big fan of the classic horror movies- horror movies from the 70’s, 80’s and early 90’s mostly. Those movies were all a little grainy and looked like they were filmed on your uncle’s camcorder that popped out strait VHS tapes. Those for some reason are the ones I liked the most. The horror movies from our generation (meaning came out in the late 90’s/early 2000) never really scared me for some reason. The movies like Scream or I Know What You Did Last Summer never scared me. Mostly because I thought every girl in those movies were hot and would be willing to get stabbed in the neck with a sickle if it meant being with them. And even some of the more recent ones haven’t got me either for some reason.

So here is my list, feel free to disagree because it is coming from someone who really likes Chris Brown’s music.

Halloween (1978)- Some guy with a white emotionless face who kills people with a knife I can easily find in my kitchen. Plus I learned not to hide in closets from psychopathic murders, it is important to learn new things.

The Ring (2002)- What is more scary than some strange little girl coming into your living room soaking wet? At the very least she will complain a lot. But this one also murdered you and turned your face into silly putty.

Poltergeist (1982)- This one actually didn’t scare me that much, because I think I wasn’t ready to give up watching TV at that point in my life, It was worth the trip to hell for me at that young age, ehh priorities.

The Omen (1976)- This little kid was always dressed up and that scared me. When the woman climbs that house and says “This is all for you Damien” and kills herself, what an awkward party to be at afterwards, makes your gift look like shit.

The Sixth Sense (1999)- Despite the ending of the movie blowing my mind (no spoilers here..), the part in the school where he sees the woman… not going to lie – that got me.

Hellraiser (1987)- Thanks to a weird voice, black leather and some pins in a demon torturers head is the reason why I never got into S&M.

The Descent (2005)- One would think a bunch of hot chicks going into a cave together would turn into a nice porno… well it did not.

Nightmare on Elm Street Part 2 (1985)- Chose this one over the original only because of the hilarious shower scene, and a school bus driving into the desert horrifies me for some reason. That tells you all you need to know about my trips to school I guess.

Friday the 13th (1980)- The 37 sequels that followed kind of ruined the original, including one in space (Freddy X watch it for the pure hilarity) but I still have to say I hate summer camp, never went, but still hate the idea of it.

Saw (2004)- This one got even more scary for me when I started drinking and waking up in weird places, occasionally in hand cuffs.

Psycho (1960)- I was like 8 when my older sister and her friends thought it would be funny to show me this. The music still gets me.

The Shining (1980)- This is the movie that made me chose not to be a writer. Oh shit, wait a minute…

Texas Chainsaw Massacre (1974)- Hey, lets wear an entire body suit made up of people. Plus a remake with Jessica Biel, big Jessica Biel fan, she can do no wrong in my book.

Paranormal Activity (2007)- Had to throw this in there only because I saw this in college and was so hung-over when I saw it I almost threw up from fear and the fact that the theatre was spinning. It felt like I was in the movie. Also never date a chick with baggage; otherwise a demon could potentially murder you.

The Thing (1982)- Probably my favorite horror movie ever because my dad said it was the scariest movie he ever saw. And it lived up to it too. It steered me away from becoming a ground breaking scientist who studies climate in Antarctica. That and the fact that I’m not that smart, either or.

The Exorcist (1973)- The coup de grace of horror films in my opinion. Even the little thing of a giant flame made me contemplate never sleeping again. Quick story, I saw this movie when I was a freshman in high school on Halloween and my parents warned me it was scary, but I wanted to watch it anyway with the lights off the whole deal. So they go to bed 10 minutes into the movie as I sit to finish the movie alone. All of a sudden weird noises start coming from outside the room on the other side of the giant glass sliding door we hard. The leaves of the tree start magically moving up and down. I stopped the movie to see if anyone was out there or awake, no one was there. Start the movie back up and 10 minutes later at a crucial part my father slams the giant window and I legitimately start going into the early stages of shock. Let’s just say something came out of my body unexpectedly and leave it at that. Solid film, even better father.

Also like to shout out Session 9 (2001) a horror movie about the mental hospital my grandmother once worked it and the town where my family is from. Too many horrible stories I’ve heard about that place growing up and people who visited it after it was shut down.

Some other horror movies to check out: Rec (2007), Ju-On (2002), Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978), Salem’s Lot (1979), The Conjuring (2013), The Amityville Horror (1979), and The Happening (2008) ….just kidding, that last one is terrible.

By Curtis Spiliotis

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