“Reality Bites.” Love the movie, hate the title. On principle.
I am speaking to you as a woman who used to use the phrases “I hate my life,” “FML” and “of course this is happening to me right now, why wouldn’t it?” on a daily basis. Being from the east coast, I was able to pull off the cynical New Yorker vibe for a while- some even found it endearing. Once I started doing some work on myself though, I realized that those phrases were having a profound effect on my life (and not in a good way).
One of my favorite teachers, Byron Katie says “You can see only what you believe- nothing else is possible”.
Let that sink in for a minute and I’ll break it down for you. Good news is this: in every moment, with every thought and action you take, you are creating your world. Bad news is this: You have to put on your big girl and big boy pants and take responsibility for the reality that is your life and the fact that you’re in control. It’s not as much fun sometimes but for the most part is pretty empowering and exciting.
The moments happening in your day-to-day life are neither good or bad, they just are. Nothing is happening to you– it’s simply happening. It’s how we choose to view situations that determine the story we create around them. Give yourself permission to let go of the story. Life may happen differently than you thought or than you “wanted” in a particular moment but it’s neither good nor bad.
We choose how we feel and we choose the thoughts we have. This does however mean that in order to create change in your life you need to go off autopilot and start living in the moment and being conscious.
In other words, WAKE UP. Make the choice to have a different thought and if it feels unnatural in the beginning, fake it until it doesn’t. Your thoughts will attract other like thoughts so the more positive thoughts you have the more positive thoughts you’ll have. Write that down.
Change your set-point, the way you look at the world. In every thought there is a belief. Practice and learn a new way to think so you can master a new way to be. Write that down too. Cue the inspirational song…this is where you play your favorite inspirational song about life… or, HERE’S one for you.
By Megan Monahan